Lately, I’ve been spending a lot of time in Genesis. This journey through the Bible, it’s been as though the words and stories are brand new to me and it’s felt like the first time reading these stories. 

And you want to know what’s stuck out to me? 

God is faithful. 

I know, I know. You’re probably thinking .. okay Allie, seminary has taught you that?! But hear me out. 

I know for myself that, more often than not, I like to complicate things. I want to open Genesis and figure out a revelation the world has never heard before. I want to dive deep into the text to see some deep awareness of how the Hebrew word can apply to my life. 

But in my attempt to complicate I overlook the beauty of the simple revelations.

And this time, all Jesus has been showing me is that, quite simply, He is faithful. 

Over on the podcast (here) I’ve been talking about the patriarchs of the faith, which I definitely think you should check out after reading this! I remember reading Genesis the first few times and being so caught up with how amazing Abraham seemed. I was so struck by his faith and his obedience. And while that’s real, to an extent, in being so caught up in Abraham’s story I forgot that it was really God’s story. 

I’m a perfectionist and I like to be active in my faith. So every time I read the story of Abraham, I would look at ways to emulate Abraham’s faith. I’d be so caught up in how Abraham walked his journey. All the while, completely ignoring that Abraham’s story wasn’t a story about him, it was a story about God. I would gloss over Abraham’s flaws and propensities to sin. I would gloss over the times he messed up, except for Ishmael, cause that one’s kinda in your face. 

Fast forward to this time reading through Genesis and I was blown away by how messed up Abraham was at times. I mean, this guy lied about his wife twice. As if he didn’t learn his lesson the first time. 

Here’s the thing - this time, reading Genesis, I realized that Abraham was a human, just like me. That Abraham’s propensity to doubt and lie mirrors my own. That when I come up with my own plans to make God’s promises happen, Abraham can relate. 

The reality of Abraham’s story is that God is faithful. 

Amidst Abraham’s lies, doubts, fears, frustrations, attempts to hurry the timeline along … God is faithful. 

Last week I wrote this in my journal: 

“Jesus, I am believing the lie that I’m missing out on your promises because of some fatal sin or flaw in my life. I’m believing the lie that I don’t deserve the promises you’ve spoken over me because I’ve done something to not deserve them. The vow I’ve made is that I’ll never be good enough for your promises and it has made my heart feel hopeless.” 

(How’s that for some vulnerability?)

Do you want to know what Abraham’s story shows me? 

That these thoughts I’m believing are exactly that, they’re lies. They are lies from the pit of hell to get me more captivated by fear than focused on Jesus. 

When I read the story of Abraham, I see a faithful God despite the flaws of Abraham. I see a God who comes through despite Abraham’s doubts. I see a God who holds up His Word and His promises despite the sins Abraham committed. 

And I take that same perspective and apply it to my life … 

In the story God is writing over my life, I see a faithful God despite my flaws. I see a God who has and will continue to come through for me despite my doubts. And I see a God who holds up His Word and His promises over me despite the sins I have and continue to commit. 

My story isn’t mine. It’s the Lord’s. It’s God working in my life to bring glory to His name. And the way He brings glory to His name is showing His faithfulness time and time and time again. 

Friends, I wanted to get incredibly vulnerable today to share a glimpse of where I’m at. I’ve been wrestling with these thoughts and lies of not feeling worthy of the promises God has spoken over me because I’m not good enough. 

But I’m learning to rest in the reality that the promises of God aren’t dependent on me. They’re dependent on Him. 

So I break the vow that I have to be perfect to inherit His promises. And I step into the truth that nothing can stop the plans and promises of the Lord. It’s the Lord who keeps His Word. 

I break the vow that my perfectionism helps to spur God’s timeline along. And I step into the truth that He knows the plans that He has for me, and at the appointed time they will come to pass. 

I break the vow that I’m unworthy of His promises. And I step into the truth that I am worthy because His ultimate sacrifice has deemed me worthy, not my strength, power or works. 

I have to trust the scriptures when they say: 

Psalm 138:2 (KJV)

 “I will worship toward thy holy temple, and praise thy name for thy lovingkindness and for thy truth: for thou hast magnified thy word above all thy name.”

Psalm 89:34 (ESV)

I will not violate my covenant or alter the word that went forth from my lips.

Isaiah 55:11 (ESV)

So shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it

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And I have to trust that when the Lord says He has the best time in mind for His promises to be fulfilled, He really, really does.